It has been an emotional past couple of weeks for me. This blog is going to talk about some spiritual things that have happened in the past couple weeks, and might be really long. If you do not want to read anything spiritual or a very long post you better go find another blog to read. If you decide you want to know the nitty griddy of whats been going on and why I chose my new job, then this is the perfect post for you. WARNING THIS IS A LONG POST, I have changed names, and gave a lot of details. More details and things that happened are spared but you can get the idea of what happened.
Most people do not know what I do for my job, and that is mainly because it is not a job I am necessarily proud of. It is a job that pays okay, and gives me so much new experience, but not a job I can see myself having for years to come. Basically, I work for a pest control company. My title is secretary, but really I am an office manager. I run the office, discipline employees as needed (only happened once luckily), do payroll, office errands, supervise scheduling, make sure invoices are getting paid by the customers, and pay the office bills. The experience I have gotten is awesome and can take me so far, but I have the wrong job title and wrong pay for my job. I am under appreciated and my boss focuses more on the summer sales (aka door to door salesman) than the people doing the actual work (technicians, myself, and the scheduler). Anyways - my boss, for the most part is really cool, except for the past week :(
Anyways, now that we have my history a bit explained I can go more into my story.... Will and I decided that my job was not necessarily the job for me, but I promised my boss I would be there for 1 year (October would be 1 year), and its the busy season so when the summer starts to end I would be looking for a better opportunity that better fit me. Well, I had a very old resume on LDSJobs, I honestly never thought a job would be interested in me so I just left my resume go, and did not bother to update it. A couple of weeks ago I checked my email and got an email from LDSJobs saying an employer is trying to contact me. So I figure out how to check my email through LDSJobs and I give the employer a call. I got invited to do an interview, which lasted a long time, which is a good sign right?! It is a great opportunity and I felt really good about the job, really excited, so I wrote a thank you letter and put it in the mail. Now about the interview - it turns out that the lady (let's say Sue is her name) that interviewed me is the owners wife, and the office manager. Her family lived in the Seattle area for about 10 years, way before I moved there. The family lived in Kirkland and Bellevue, so not far at all from our stomping grounds. We got talking about Seattle, and Alderwood Mall, and pretty much just felt comfortable talking to each other. After a while of talking she called the the lady I would be replacing into the interview. This lady interviewed me for a few minutes and I asked a few questions. I felt comfortable around her and not like I was really in a serious interview but more reminiscing of life in Seattle. So, I mentioned before I sent a thank you letter off in the mail. One downfall, probably the only downfall, to the job is that there is benefits, but not medical benefits because it is a small office. The job pays for membership to a membership medical clinic, but it is not insurance; but, better than I have now, so Sue (name change) was surprised that I was still interested in the job. I told her it is better than I have now and we can still get medical taken care of, so it would be just fine. Minutes before getting the call for the second interview a friend texted me a video and said she has a feeling to send me the video so I watch it. It is a favorite Mormon Message of Will's so I had watched it several times. I was a bit confused as to why I was watching this video and why she felt like she needed to send it to me. Just as the video ended I started texting my friend and seconds later, before I finished the text message my phone rings and it is the job calling me back for a second interview. All this started to make sense on why I should watch that video. Now onto the second interview...
I got invited to a second interview just over a week ago. It was a Friday early afternoon. Perfect timing because my boss had just flown to California so no one would be in the office so I could take extra time for my break if needed, and I could get changed into nice clothes without it being overly obvious. I was told the interview would be with Sue and the owner so that was what I was expecting. I hadn't drank really any water that day so it was embarrassing because I felt like I had a cotton mouth when I got there I could hardly speak and my mouth was so dry. The owner was in another meeting so I sat and spoke with the bookkeeper (Sue's daughter), and an agent (Larry, name change). I now feel stupid because I thought Larry was the owner of the company, ha ha, so I sat there speaking with him thinking it was the owner. Sue told Larry that I was from Seattle, and Larry had also lived in Seattle for many years and not far from where I used to work. He said he lived between two cities and I said oh really, so did my husband, you might know him. He did not really think to much about that comment; until later. Sue was there more for moral support and Larry and the bookkeeper started asking me a bunch of questions, and really getting to know me more. We talked a lot about Seattle and connected that way. Towards the end of the conversation while we were waiting for the owner to come into meet me Sue asked Larry if there was any questions he wanted to ask me, so he said sure let me see her resume. He took a look at my last name and asked who my in-laws were. I said yes that is them, and sure enough he knows exactly who the Cook family is. He used to be their home teacher in church 18 or so years ago. He said he does not really remember Will and Sean, but I dunno, Will is hard to forget, but does remember Noelle because she was just a toddler running around, but most definitely remembers Bill and Debbie! CRAZY small world!!! At this point I felt really good about the job, felt comfortable around the people and feeling excited about the possibility of a new job.
Monday happens - Monday, mid morning I get a text from Sue saying she would love if I would come in and work for them and give notice to my boss. I did not text back because I was really busy at work but I forwarded the text to Will and I already had plans to stop by his work on lunch so we could talk about it. Sue called me and said I would like you to come work for us so please give notice to your boss. I said I had plans to have lunch with my husband so I just want to talk to him and I will call her back in just over an hour. So I get to his work and he comes out with a big smile on his face and said, so are you excited for the new job?! Meaning - take the new job so after I left I called Sue back and accepted the offer but told her my boss is out of town until Tuesday so I have to wait to tell him. It was tempting on emailing him, but I knew that wouldn't be right. It gave me a day to think about it and how I would break the news to him. I knew he wouldn't be happy about it because the timing is so awful but I never expected his reaction. Will kept asking me, what are you going to do if your boss won't let you leave, what if he gives you a good offer. I told Will, yeah right it will all work out.
Tuesday happens - I pick up my boss from the airport and as we are nearing his house I break the news to him, and completely throw him off guard... Hey boss man, welcome back to reality, I quit, did not go over so well; okay I really did it much better than that. So, he asked me a bunch of questions and trying to make sense of it all. I kept telling him it was nothing personal, this job came to me and Will and I talked about it and decided to see what options were out there. I know I need medical benefits, that is a priority, and I would not be at my job forever, so why not check out other opportunities. Tuesday evening right as I am leaving my boss asks if he could speak with me. We end up talking for about 30 minutes and he lays out all his frustrations, and trying to make sense of it all. He would be willing to give me a $1.50 raise, a $1000 bonus, and better hours if I decided to stay until October. Right now, all that would be amazing and help us out a lot. I was flabbergasted and I told him he had a lot of valid points as to why I should stay. I asked that he gave me until Wednesday for me to talk to Will, pray, and go to the temple. At that moment the job felt SO right. The Holy Ghost had constantly been telling me that I need to take this change. I had a blessing days before all this happened that basically said to go with what I know is right, and everything will be okay. The blessing was for a completely different reason, but that comes back to mind often. I have always been the head strong one in our marriage, I stand up for what I think would be best for our family, so I did not think to much about what the blessing was saying.
Tuesday night/Wednesday happens - I felt so strong about the job. I felt the Holy Ghost was telling me exactly what I needed to do, yet I felt so sad and confused because my boss had given me a great opportunity, everything I kept telling Will privately I wanted I was getting from my current boss. I kept crying, and praying and crying and praying over and over and over again. It felt SO right, but I felt SO bad. The feelings do not go together. Tuesday evening into Wednesday evening I kept looking for scriptures or articles by the church that would help me figure out if the feeling I was getting was the Holy Ghost or just nerves. I kept watching the video my friend had texted me. On either Tuesday or Wednesday night while I laid in bed just searching for an answer my Mom texted me D&C 8 1-5 & D&C 9 7-9 (I think). I was awake when I got this text (11:15 pm) just searching and I read the scriptures over twice. The perfect scripture came to my Mom's head to send to me at the time I needed it most. It was the time when I was really really searching. During this time frame of Tuesday to Wednesday other small miracles happened. I told my Mom by biggest concern about the job and that was I would be losing 5 hours a week of work because the work day was only 7.5 hours long. The hours add up quickly and I would have lost a decent amount of money. My Mom suggested I let Sue know my concerns so I did that and Sue offered me to come in an hour early each day to make up for that 1 hour a day of lost time. Several friends reached out to me and said a few things that other friends had said, things that I hadn't thought about, which would go to help me decide. One thing my boss told me that Tuesday evening is that he had been thinking for the past couple weeks that he should look for a man to do my job. Not because I have done a horrible job, because I had done a great job, but because a lot of my job entails things that he thinks a women should not be doing, which I agree. He said he feels really bad asking me to do a lot of the jobs, and some jobs I simply won't do or cannot do so it makes sense to have a guy work the office. Basically - my job is a temporary job. He would keep me around until I found a more suitable job and if he hires someone new before I got a job I would stay on and he would find work for me to do. I appreciate that he was open with me about this because I had no clue he was thinking this. October is only 2 months away, that time goes by really quickly, so that was a big deciding factor. Anyways - so several friends had make comments about me working temporarily, and all comments were the same, within a very short window of each other. This experience made me realize that it is God telling me something, giving me a sign through other people. I do not think this was a coincidence. Many other things happened those two days, but the blog post is long enough so I will spare you more details, you get it.
Thursday happens - Thursday came and I still had not given my boss and answer. We were getting ready to go to Yellowstone and I felt like I wanted to go to Yellowstone happy, and less stressed so I wanted to give him an answer. I called him right before I left Thursday and said thank you for your generous offer but I am still going to go with this new job. After a good twenty minutes of a guilt trip and me feeling absolutely down and feeling worse I decided to call my new job on the way home from work and turn down the offer. Sue and I were both about in tears talking to each other. I told her I could not take the offer because my boss will not let me go. Every time I told him I could not take the offer he would come back and guilt trip me some more so although everything points for me to take the job and I feel EXTREMELY good about taking the job I just could not do it. As I was talking to her she tells a guy that's in the office that I cannot take the job because my boss will not let me go. The guy keeps telling me something in the background but I could not understand what he was saying so he got on the phone and basically said that I cannot be held at a job if I do not want to be there and that he doesn't own me. I told him that I promised my boss 1 year of employment and it has not been a year and he said plans change, things happen and you need to look out for yourself. After that Sue said she needed to go into an office alone to tell me a personal thing that happened that she really should not say because it is work and needs to stay professional. I told her it is okay, and to talk to me. She said that she put my name into the temple on the prayer roll so that everything will go smoothly and I would be able to handle everything going on. At this point Sue had no clue what was going on. She works in the temple and on Tuesday or Wednesday, I can't remember which day, I kept getting a thought into my head saying Sue knows, she knows something is going on. I kept shrugging it off because it is just a thought, my head is playing games with me, but really, now I know my brain was not playing games with me but it was the Holy Ghost trying to tell me that she knows. When I was talking to her I kept saying this feels so right, but I feel so bad. She said I know Brooke, I know, I know you are supposed to work for me, I know you are going through a tough time, I know. I kept wondering, well how do you know. I have not shared anything with you, and I am barely sharing whats going on with you, I am just slightly skimming over the details. After she told me that she put my name on the temple prayer roll I knew at that moment that I am exactly where I need to be, I will be her employee, and I cannot fight this feeling anymore. I told her that my boss threatened (as Will says, blackmailed) me saying if this job does not work out and another employer calls him for a reference he will say I was a great employee but will not leave out the details to how I left him high and dry in the middle of his busiest time for a new job. He would tell the new job that I cannot be trusted and how I jeopardized his business for myself. On My boss also told me that he would not sue me for leaving but it would financially hurt his business because he will have to stop selling in order to run the office. I told Sue about the reference part and she said she never called him, never intended to, that she did not feel right about doing that so she contacted my old job in Washington and got to recommendations from them. She said she was not worried about my boss and his recommendation and to not worry that everything will work out. She said that I will be much happier and the employees all support each other and I would never be talked to the way I had been recently. The 10 minute conversation with her was exactly what I needed to hear. I asked if she could give me some time to think some more and pray some more and she said of course, but not to take too long because if I decided to not take the job they have to find someone immediately, but I could tell she was still confident I would not turn down the offer.
Thursday afternoon - We finally get in the car and start our drive into Yellowstone. Will and I are seriously talking about everything. We both agree I should take the job, but both of us feel so awful on me not sticking to my word with my boss and staying for a year. Will says it is my decision and he will be okay with whatever I decide but who I am is a women of her word. If I say something I will try everything to stick by it, especially when it comes to my daughter and my job. Honestly and loyalty is part of who I am and I felt like I was throwing those two things out the window. Will asked that I still think about it until Friday evening. He wanted me to be able to get into nature knowing that nature will help clear my mind. On our way to Yellowstone we stopped at Yellowstone Bear World and we had Bear with us. Bill was sitting outside with the dogs while we were in the park playing. I came out and took Bear from him and needed a bit of time to myself. I took Bear to the car to cool down and get a drink while I let my phone charge. I sat in my car just chilling and thinking. I decided that no one was around, no one could influence my feelings I had so I called Sue and let her know I was keeping her job offer. Sudden relief happened and I could finally smile again! I did not want to tell my boss, and did not really tell anyone, but I wanted to just keep it all to myself for a bit. On Friday we went to Yellowstone and we were really able to sit and talk while being in the wonderful world God made. Everything felt right and at the end of the day I had all confirmation that I had made the right decision and I would let my boss know I was for sure quitting. I emailed him so it was written down, and in case he did decide to sue me I had my written notice with everything on the email with dates.
I really had a whirlwind of a week. It started out great and ended great with a lot of drama, stress, crying, and prayers stuck in the middle. I have no clue what this new opportunity has in story for me, but I wonder if it is something big because I really had to go through a lot. Heavenly Father tested me to see if I would stick to him and trust him. I really saw the hand of Satin working through my boss. Will's biggest weakness right now is money. Will wants so badly to be able to make sure all bills are paid and we have extra money in the account and some aside for savings. I kept saying I feel like Satin is playing through my boss, and I really think he was. I have no idea what is in store for me but I like to hope it is something great. I truly can say I took the job completely of faith. If it was not for the constant feeling I got, and the Holy Ghost guiding other people to me I would not have taken the job. Many people had their hands into my messy and sticky situation. Heavenly Father knew who to send my way to lift me up and encourage me and help me on this decision. It was one of the hardest decisions I have had to make, as Will said, it could really be a life changing decision. As one of my co-workers said today "you must really be paying extra in tithing". No, we have not paid extra in tithing; we are just a family trying desperately hard to get a break in life right now. We are a family trying so hard to get a breather and do better in our life. Heavenly Father has really blessed my family over the past few weeks.
So - I am working right now to finish out my last week of full time work. I am going to work part time in the evenings for my boss to pull him through the busy selling season. It is a win-win situation for all.
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